


Making a Name for Yourself

by Snowfilly1



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), But Crowley is dripping ink near the books, Crowley fights a squid, Crowley inspires legends and folklore, Crowley is Bad at Being a Demon (Good Omens), Holiday, Humor, Inspired by myths, M/M, Octopi & Squid, Sea Snake Crowley, Snake Crowley, author is sorry, they love each other very much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-07
Updated: 2020-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:15:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23056105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snowfilly1/pseuds/Snowfilly1
Summary: ‘I said, “The squid was being a dick.”‘Do you know, I rather thought you did.’ Aziraphale tried to stifle a grin; failed badly. ‘I realise I may regret this, but in what way can a squid in a tank be any trouble to someone who, I’ve been told hundreds of times, is a nasty, fierce, demon?’Crowley gets in a fight and creates some local mythology. For the Ineffable Husbands FB group challenge 'squid fight.'
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 135
Collections: Week 3: Squid Fight





	Making a Name for Yourself

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little bit of swearing.

Really, Aziraphale blamed himself. A Crowley willing to get out of bed, a Crowley willing to leave the house before midday on a day when it was raining -and on his own, nonetheless – was a Crowley who was up to something. He had 6,000 years of friendship and almost a year of living together to back that feeling up, so yes, it was pretty inexcusable that he hadn’t realised something was going on.

He turned the TV off and turned to stare across the front room of the holiday cottage at the demon.

Crowley looked down at his boots and shuffled slightly, but had the sense to stay by the door.

‘Would you like to repeat that, dear?’

There was a low growl.

‘I’m sorry, my hearing is playing up today. Did that noise have any explanation for what you just said?’

‘I said, _“The squid was being a dick.”_

‘Do you know, I rather thought you did.’ Aziraphale tried to stifle a grin; failed badly. ‘I realise I may regret this, but in what way can a squid in a tank be any trouble to someone who, I’ve been told hundreds of times, is a nasty, fierce, demon?’

He refrained from mentioning how said demon had fallen asleep on the sofa the previous night, listening to Aziraphale read The Wind in the Willows, or that they’d slept there snuggled together under a blanket. By the glare he got in response, Crowley was aware of it.

Another few drips of ink run off Crowley’s hair and landed on the floor.

‘Right, that’s enough. Go and clean yourself up and don’t get ink anywhere, and then I want to hear this story.’

Crowley made a frankly obscene gesture at him. ‘You’re finding my misery far too funny, angel. Freezing to death here.’

‘Because you jumped into a tank of sea water to fight a squid, Crowley! And you miracled yourself back here. I thought…no, go and shower and I’ll make you some coffee.’

Another glare, and Crowley made a needlessly dramatic show of heading into the bathroom, although he retained enough common sense not to get ink anywhere near the books Aziraphale had brought with them.

As a concession, Aziraphale suggested to all the heaters in the cottage that they might like to work a little harder. And dug out the extra blanket. And found some biscuits that he knew Crowley actually liked.

Crowley stalked back into the room a few minutes later, hair ruffled, wearing a black sweater that Aziraphale was sure they’d left back in London. He flung himself down onto the sofa and grabbed his mug. The thank you was entirely unspoken but heartfelt; Aziraphale found himself smiling at the demon even as he tried to stay annoyed about the situation.

He let Crowley warm up – something that apparently required Crowley squirming almost on to his lap – and finish his coffee before asking again.

‘So. What happened and you are aware squids are edible? If he offended you that badly, I’m sure a local restaurant might have been able to deal with him better.’

Crowley sighed, and tried to flatten his hair down. ‘Do you have any idea how hard it is to get ink off of black glasses? I can still see spots. No, angel, I didn’t want him killed, just being a bit better mannered. And don’t you dare say _that’s nice,_ otherwise I’ll cancel all our dinner reservations til we get home.’

Aziraphale passed him a comb. ‘Story time, dear.’

‘Fine. I knew you wouldn’t want to go out, you’d been raving about that book ever since you picked it up, so…and the aquarium was closed for staff training, so I thought I’d go and talk to the sea snakes for a bit. Anyway, this blessed squid they had there recognised me – I mean the turtle recognised me, but she was perfectly polite, asked how I was doing these days – and he apparently recognised me from something his great great whatever grandsire said and he said some very unpleasant things about me.’

Aziraphale run through the resulting questions in order of how much he was probably going to regret the answers and settled for ‘So you were snake form for this?’

‘No! Of course not. The tanks are all human eye level, angel. I wouldn’t have been able to see.’

‘And the squid recognised you because?’

Crowley went a shade of red that clashed with his hair. ‘You go in the sea just once as a snake and wham, there’s people taking photos of you and giving you a stupid bloody name and a prissy little squid sees you and tells all his sodding family about you and before you know it, you’re back here on holiday and the damn squids are still laughing at you, _and someone’s written a children’s book about you._

‘Oh, great, don’t you join in as well. That’s all I need. Where’s my sympathy?’

Aziraphale tried to rein in his laughter and failed. Affronted, Crowley bore a marked resemblance to a cross cat. ‘Why on Earth were you swimming around as a snake anyway?’

There was a reply that sounded very much like ‘fuck off, angel.’

He paused, and extended an arm to Crowley, who crawled underneath it and sat alongside him. _I’m only teasing you know…It’s alright, angel, so am I._ Reassured that Crowley wasn’t too bothered, he pushed on. ‘Cornwall isn’t known for having nice warm seas, dear. What possessed you to try that?’

‘I was trying to lure some swans in, if you must know, alright. There were being so horrible to this little kid, and his parents were snapping at him because he was afraid, and he wanted to build a sandcastle and these damn feathery things wouldn’t let him, so I thought I’d snake off and lure them out into the sea so they wouldn’t bother him anymore.’

‘Oh.’ Aziraphale pushed his lips against Crowley’s cheek, a brief wordless song of praise.

‘I didn’t know there was a poxy photographer there. Comes as a shock to see yourself splashed on the papers next week, I can tell you.’

‘Oh, my darling,’ and Aziraphale couldn’t keep the fondness out of his voice. ‘Only you…’

‘I sold it to Hell as stirring up conspiracy theories. They liked that. The squid told everyone I smelt funny, and not like a fish, so…’

‘Well, he was right wasn’t he? You’re not a fish.’

‘Good job too,’ Crowley grumbled and dropped his head onto Azirphale’s shoulder. ‘Can we forget this now? ‘m tired.’

‘Of course.’ Aziraphale run a gentle hand through his hair and pulled him closer. ‘But I want to hear about this book. If someone’s written a book about my love, I think it’s only right I get a copy. Maybe two.’

‘Oi!’

**Author's Note:**

> So for this to work, Crowley was sea-snaking around Cornwall, specifically Pendennis Point, near Falmouth in the mid 1970s. There's a fine local sea serpent there called Morgawr, who was reportedly photographed at least once and has been 'seen' on and off around Falmouth and the Lizard occasionally since then. 
> 
> There are bad tempered swans on the beach near Mounts Bay, Cornwall. They have at least once prevented me from swimming and I've seen them menace a small child. 
> 
> There is an aquarium near Newquay, Cornwall. They don't have squids or sea snakes, but they do have a beautiful rescued turtle who I'm sure would be very polite. 
> 
> There are indeed some children's picture books about Morgawr! 
> 
> I'm sure sometimes Aziraphale just looks at his demon and goes 'why this one? Why do I love this one?' This is one of those times.


End file.
